Christmas Gifts…. (For People You Hate)

Finals are over and I’m finally free from studying and pretty much all responsibility again, guys! I am once again yours, internet!

After my seven hour drive home, I had a lot of time to think. Time to realize that I hadn’t gotten ANYONE anything. (’cause I’m po’) Anyway, I got to thinking about how much I hate people and shopping for presents. It was then when I was struck with a brilliant idea! (For you see, I do my best thinking only after I’ve been driving mindlessly for four hours)

I’ve played a lot of good video games in my time, but I’ve also had my share of some very bad, bad games. Have to do some Christmas shopping for a certain someone that you don’t particularly care for but need to keep up appearances?

I ho ho hate you!

Here’s a list of some video games that absolutely made my skin crawl and made me seriously consider throwing controllers against the wall.

Let’s start with the obvious

I like Sonic, I really do, but Sega should have given up before it came to this.. The game is impossible to play. The loading times are terrible, it takes about five minutes to load one area, including when traveling in the city. Just image trying to make your way across the town, but every time you 30 to make it to the next stage across town. With that and the terrible controls and glitches, good luck getting anywhere in this game.

This second one I feel real bad about putting up because I love the anime soooo much, buuuuutt…

Yu Yu Hakusho, a wonderful anime that I am completely obsessed with. Now, I’m not really into fighting games, but I’m no noob. I know what makes a good fighting game… This game has none of that. This game is sooooo incredibly unbalanced that it made me want to throw my controller in fits of rage!! However, if you want something that reenacts the frustration that Urameshi and his team felt during the tournament then this is a good simulator.

This next one however… I shall show no mercy

First though, imagine if you will a young girl given free will to get anything for less than fifteen dollars at a game store when she sees this.

Look at that beautiful cover art. You have a smexy lady up in the corner there with a mysterious, also smexy man with a sort of contraption on his arm. It certainly caught my eye when looking around the store. I hadn’t heard of the game before, but I said, “What the hell” and took a chance on this game…

This game was SOOOOOO BORRRIINNNGGG.

I tried, I really did, and no one can say that I don’t like story in games because I love the $#/+ outta Metal Gear’s convoluted story.

This game however made me want to go into a coma. Aside from the brain dead story the game doesn’t really… do game things. It’s more like a interactive visual novel. At times you will be made to attack viruses using the touch screen, but even that is boring!

In addition, this game has instances where you can play yourself into a corner and have to completely start a new game. The only good thing about my purchase was that it came with an artbook.

Well guys, that’s all I got for now, do what you will with this information, I am not responsible for any broken controllers or consoles.

-Karinacus

 

… I should stop driving deliriously.